Life's Tough: Get a Helmet

A story about part of my yesterday:

I had just arrived in the cafe area of the University of London student union yesterday to meet a friend for a mid-afternoon tea and snack.  I was a few minutes early and had to use the ladies room.  I put my bag and coat down at a table grabbed my keys/wallet/phone and went to the bathroom.  I left the keys/wallet/phone on the sink outside of the stall, used the bathroom and was just thinking how I shouldn't be so trusting and leave a bag with my computer (aka lifeline) in it at a table outside when I stepped out of the stall and realized that my keys/wallet/phone were not on the sink.  Talk about unfunny irony.  Talk about panic.  I ran outside the bathroom, asking everyone in my path if they had seen said keys/wallet/phone, thinking about how stupid I was and how this was actually a disaster--the wallet had cash/credit/debit/all of my university i.d.'s/american license, it was my only set of keys and my phone had every london contact I did NOT know by heart.  After what felt like eternity(it was probably 3 minutes) of running around I went up to the cafe counter and said to the man behind it: "I think my phone and wallet have been stolen where should I report this" and he promptly pointed and said something along the lines of "oh I think a lady over there brought it out..." to which I ran in the direction of the lady who was standing in front of the welcome counter.  I saw my keys/phone/wallet at the desk.  I had barely breathed a sigh of relief when the lady who apparently had brought my things there said angrily "Aren't you going to say thank you?"...

what??  I quickly sputtered a "thank you", grabbed my things and went back to my table.  I sat there for a few minutes, thoughts racing in my mind: "thank you thank you thank you God and whoever else is watching over me"..."mental note NEVER leave items on sink again"..."what the heck was that lady's problem?"...When my poor friend arrived a few minutes later I burst into tears at her dismay.  As I tried to explain the situation to her though my sobs she kindly listened/ gave me a hug/ and asked me why exactly I was sobbing at the fact belongings were nearly stolen and all had ended well.  It was a valid question that I couldn't quite explain.  There had been a lot of emotionally charged feelings within a total of five minutes?  A stranger had taken my belongings off of a sink counter while I was still in the stall(aka I hadn't actually left them anywhere and then she had been harsh and rude to me within literally one second of seeing me)?  I think both of these might have contributed to sending a girl with thinner skin than she'd like into a sobfest.

I'm not sure I have a moral to the story yet.  Here are a few I can think of now:

1) Don't leave your belongings in places where you would not know what to do if they went missing.  Because they might.

2) If you think you are doing a good deed, and then it turns out it was really not a good deed, but you just took someone's stuff from them, don't be mean to them and immediately demand thanks.

3) Make sure you have friends who will listen to you tell stories like this one, whether they live near you and will sit in a cafe with you while you publicly sob or whether they live far from you and will write you an email with kind and understanding words that make you feel justified and loved.  Those are your people.

4)  Finally,  having tough skin is hard.  Harder for some than others.  It's easy to get upset when people yell at you to move in the streets(or call you a moron) or yell at you for talking on the phone on a bus, or push you while getting on the train, or honk at you, give you the middle finger or cut you off in traffic.  Those are all mean things.  But those people don't know you, they are just frustrated at things in their own life, just as you are.

So, I guess the moral of the story is, don't take things too personally, and also: "life's tough, get a helmet".  And then get some chocolate and caramel, and start a blog or a journal, so you can write down things that have happened to you and how you feel about them.

It helps, I promise.

Valentine's Day and being an adult(like)

So, I haven't written in a while.  I got back to school in January and I got overwhelmed and I kept thinking of things I wanted to blog about but then every time I didn't I got further away from scheduling it into my life--I find, at least for me, the least consistent I am with things like running, or writing, the less I make time for them.  But eventually, I find my way back and then I rediscover why they made me happy in the first place.

So anyway, here I am ready to write about an epiphany I just had.  I think I'm more of an adult than I thought I was.  Okay, maybe I still don't understand how to pay taxes, don't own a car, don't have a 401k(sorry to make you cringe if you read this, LYD), but I've realized recently that I've come more to terms with letting things be as they are, and I think that might be as much a sign of adulthood as any.

What does this have to do with Valentine's day?  Well first off, let me say that I've always been a bit dramatic, especially regarding matters of the heart.  Since highschool, Valentine's day was either a fabulous occasion to encourage my significant other to shower me with love and affection, or (more often) a time to be bitter, depressed and pouty about being single, "unloved" and alone.

However, I was chatting with an engaged (to be married) friend today and I asked about her plans for the big V-day tomorrow.  "ugh, i don't know" she replied, "I HATE Valentine's day".  I proceeded to say a sympathetic "aw" and then tell her, truthfully, that I had just had a great time making homemade valentine's day cards for a valentine exchange tomorrow(that will be all female).  And then I realized--I haven't had ONE bad thought about Valentine's day.  I am more single, "unloved" and alone than I have been since about the age of 14, but instead of  dwelling on this, I have been shopping for fun stickers and markers to make my girlfriends(keyword: girl) cards for our valentine's day party.  And I think being an adult (a happy one, anyway) is realizing what you have ( a group of fun girlfriends to give homemade cards too) than what you don't ( a handsome beau who showers you in homemade cards) and realizing, as Winnie the Pooh so profoundly says: "River's know this: there is no hurry, we shall get there someday".

So to sum it up: Valentine's Day is just another day.  You could be happily engaged and hate it, or happily single and love it.  The best thing to do is to try to enjoy what you have in the moment as they are.  Maybe next year on Valentine's day I'll have met the love of my life.  Maybe I won't. But that's not the point.  The point is that I don't want to miss out on enjoying what I do have because I am too busy concerning myself with what I don't. So cheers to spreading love, whatever kind of love that might be!  

Happy Valentine's Day!